Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Music To Watch Patients By #2

As mentioned previously, my doctor's surgery have been known to play a bizarre selection of music to patients in the waiting room. When we arrived this morning they were playing something very cheerful, which was a little like the Gollywog's Cakewalk but not - you know the sort of thing I mean; a little too springy for that early in the morning to be honest. But then...

Oh Fortuna! Velut luna
Statu variabilis!

Orff's Carmina Burana is not the sort of music you should be playing to patients, some of whom are going to be feeling pretty grim, others of whom may already be on edge waiting for the results of tests. I know they don't teach Latin any more, but the gist of that particular lyric would elude very few of us.

So I have since been thinking about even more inappropriate tracks to play to patients in waiting rooms. Here are my first ten songs. Feel free to suggest more - if I have enough, I may burn a compilation CD and give it to them next time I'm up there.
  1. Killing Me Softly - Roberta Flack
  2. Girlfriend in a Coma - the Smiths
  3. Somewhere a Clock is Ticking - Snow Patrol
  4. You're Tender and You're Tired - Manic Street Preachers
  5. The Drugs Don't Work - The Verve
  6. I die: You die - Gary Numan
  7. Knocking on Heaven's Door - Bob Dylan
  8. Another One Bites the Dust - Queen
  9. But I might die tonight - Cat Stevens, and also in arguably worse taste:
  10. I can't keep it in - Cat Stevens (I can't keep it in, no I can't keep it in, I've got to let it out...)


Penny L. Richards said...

Just scanning through my iTunes library...

1-Tiny Lights, "Song of the Weak"
2-Throwing Muses, "Dizzy"
3-Clann Zu, "Crashing to the Floor"
4-Pixies, "I Bleed"
5-The Jam, "The Bitterest Pill"
6-Ashley MacIsaac, "I Don't Need This"
7-Blake Babies, "Until I Almost Died"
8-Lush, "When I Die"
9-Zapmama, "De la Vie a la Mort"
10-The Sundays, "Here's Where the Story Ends"

Lady Bracknell said...

Lady Bracknell is not terribly up on the work of modern hit beat combos. However, she gathers that the Blue Oyster Cult had something of a hit some years ago with

"Don't Fear The Reaper".

Anonymous said...

I once rang a computer helpline and they inevitably put me on hold for 20 minutes while they played that Paul Macartney Beatles song that has the line "Don't leave me standing here...."

The Goldfish said...

Fantastic. :-)

Charles, that song is appropriately entitled The Long and Winding Road.

At one point the DLA helpline played Theme from Chariots of Fire by Vangelis, which was slightly amusing.

Anonymous said...

Fine Young Cannibals, "I'm Not The Man I Used To Be" (for those recovering from a vasectomy)
Dead Can Dance, "I Am Stretched On Your Grave"
Led Zeppelin, "Sick Again"
Neil Young, "The Needle and The Damage Done"
The Cure, "The Funeral Party"
Led Zeppelin, "In My Time of Dying"
The Kinks, "Death of a Clown" (okay, perhaps this one has a limited audience)

Now I wouldn't want you to think I have a death wish, but here are three jolly little tunes:
Alice Cooper, "I Love The Dead"
Scheer, "Wish You Were Dead"
Alice Cooper, "Dead Babies"

Sally said...

Thankfully my GP Surgery does not have music to wait by, or a variation of that old favourite on the Light Programe - 'Patients' Playtime', but I will copy your lists (which are fabulous) and produce them with a flourish if ever it is suggested at a Patient Participation Group meeting.
I always, always chuckle at the first verse of No. 20 of Carmina Burana. Surely, I cannot be the only one ...? Cat Stevens is a variation on that theme. Blush.

marmiteboy said...

Judging from the amount of time it takes to get an appointment at my local surgery 'Still Ill' by The Smiths would seem appropriate.

Other songs:

Medication by Spiritualized.
(It's) In The Drugs by Low.
Medicine Magazines by Low.
Doctor, Doctor by UFO.
Get Me Away From Here, I'm Dying by Belle and Sebastian.
Hurt by Johnny Cash

pete said...

'I wanna be sedated' - THE RAMONES

And I am going to repeat that good fellow Marmite and recommend 'Hurt' by Johnny Cash as it is superb!;-)

Thanks for the glowing endorsement in your last thread.....aaaawwww shucks! pete

Marcelle Proust said...

Isn't "Can't Keep it In" loo music? Definitely must have the Ramones.

The Goldfish said...

There are quite a few songs called Medication - nobody's mentioned the Garbage one.

On a similar theme, "Just like a pill" by Pink....

Attila the Mom said...

LOL!! Brilliant!

How about "Bad Medicine" by Bon Jovi?

Or "Oops!" From The Belle of New York Soundtrack. ;-)

Sage said...

Ahem, "Hurt" by Nine Inch Nails (later covered by Johnny Cash).

I also vote for "I Wanna Be Sedated" by the Ramones.

Anonymous said...

Spirit in the Sky covered by Doctor and the Medics

Don't Go Breaking My Heart - Elton John and Kiki Dee

The Drugs Don't Work - The Verve

And Macy Gray's commentry on impairment and the percieved need to conform:
"I try to say goodbye but I choke. Try to walk away but I stumble. Though I try to hide it, it's clear"

The Goldfish said...

I'm having trouble with Blogger and currently can't publish anything new.

Anyway, I have to say that Johnny Cash's Hurt is much much better than Nine Inch Nails. But he does murder Day in the Life on the same album, for which he will never be forgiven.

Katie said...

Also, Garbage - Fix Me Now

3rd daughter said...

i'm a bit late for party, but here is my ten cents worth:

catch my disease - ben lee
ship my body home - ben lee
cigarettes will kill you' - ben lee
pushing up the daisies - the colourfield.
blood - editors
better off dead - elton john
funeral for a friend/love lies bleeding - elton john
social disease - elton john
accidents will happen - elvis costello
hurt - new order
scar tissue - red hot chili peppers
panic attack - turin brakes